There’s a new agreement drawn up by the unions for employees at Coles, including things like extended leave and a few extra cents of freezer pay per hour (woo-hoo). I flipped through it today on my lunch break, and was intrigued by one particular clause which stipulates that:

Team members involved in the responsibility of carrying moneys belonging to the Company, to or from a bank or other institution, shall be accompanied at such times by a responsible fellow team member. The Company shall not require a team member to have money chained, handcuffed or fastened to a team member’s person, unless such fastening is engaged to the team member with a quick-release mechanism.

Presumably the quick-release machanism is to provide for the circumstance of escaping a machete-wielding thief who forces the “team member” to make a quick choice between losing either several thousand dollars of company money, or their left hand. And if there’s one thing I’ve learned about legal agreements, it’s that unusual clauses are usually a measure to prevent some crazy fuck-up from ever happening again…

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